Cold as ice,Sannuland and destruction.

"Thank you for teaching me so much.

I am not bitter anymore about you dumping me.

I wont make the same mistakes.

I would like to have you back, but i dont want to be a burden

so I really am giving my best to stay away"

 those ice cold words slipped trought my mind with the tought of

 "I got dumped."

There was no bitterness,

 no self pity

, just harsh truth

, unchangable and accepted.

I wont cry.

Im not bitter.

I want to fade away.

I wont fade away.

still i want to fade away.

forever.

It is hard.

It is painful,

but i wont be able to erase it.

Is it enough?`

You have had anough?

Thank you and goodbye.

So I tell myself every fucking day.

Im sorry, It wasnt good.

I wasnt good.

You are prolly laughing now?`

I will be born again..

I will be born as myself.

Then i will give my best smile .

Just knowing you can is not enough if you still dont.

The distance. The radiance of a setting sun, i beleve its prettyer then the rise.

As it matures it gets the right color, things only end for us to start a new.

I had a busy day of wasting my time.

On what?

Obviously on making my own pity life more complicated,

thats what i always do.

Why?

Cause theres this other girl in me,

telling me im not strong enough.

Telling me, Im still not really me.

The obstacles are like mountains, only not made by the hand of god

Made by the hand of me

Once i lose control of the situation and break down again..

Thats when i will rise like a phoenix from the ashes.

To be a little bit more thn just me.

Cause Just being me, is never enough.

You know it.

Everyone does.

Its just a question of admiting it.

I know this cold voice

Im just not letting it reach me.

If i were made of ice, i would like to melt now...

enough with the time standing still.

Im sliding backwards down te mountain.

But its not like its impossible to climb back up.

Then again,

Climbing te same mountain twice seems kinda boring.

I will find a better one.