.Fuck this shit maaaaan ;D

I HAVE NO REGRETS.

I ONLY USED HIM FOR MY LITTLE GAMES.

I will keep repeating that to myself, until i start to beleve that too.

If i keep repeating that to myself i actually might start beleving that too.

REGRET IS FOR WHEN YOUR DEAD!

I wonder why?

I cant remember,

i just dont want to.

I still havent found what im looking for.
I still havent found the way to forget
the only things i have found
are ways to supidity and regret
Im never going to forget you, the people around me
but I, I just might forget who I am instead.
I might forget, the importance of myself
The unimportance of the surroundings
I might even forget, that i have forgotten .
Im still at the mercy of myself ..
Still looking for something..
something that i too might just have forgotten.
I want to find it, Myself , you
everything absolutley everything again
I want to find it
My pain, has long lost its charm
now its just a dull feeling
meaning nothing to me as do i to it,
it used to make me realize the beauty of
laughter friends and happyness
now its just there
sitting, standing still
It just doesnt change a thing anymore.
Im just drinking, drinking and drinking
theres really nothing that could save me but me.
I dont want to remember
I want to run and hide
i want to. I wish i didnt know.
Hopes, Dreams everything has been broken
by reality, by myself
my life..
theres really nothing wrong with it
nothing wrong with it
its just me ...
theres something wrong with me.
you too should know it all
a little too well
every singe ounch of my feelings,
Even so, you cant see
all the corners of my soul
you too are unable to break trough the
tests and games, unable to destroy the walls
on your way ...
Those walls around me
theyr nothing but silence , unbreakable silence
just thin air,
but still, you would prolly suffocate
Its such a pity, such a shame
i could write a book
written out of pain.
It doesnt really exsist.
Im just a ghost.
Everything just passed by ,
Everything just fell right trought me
Everything is nothing and nothing is everything .
I have got nothing to lose.
nothing...
nothing..

JUST DO EVERYTHING THAT SONG SAYS , AND I WILL LOVE YOU FOREVER ....

IMPOSSIBLE YOU KNOW.

Its cold, but not dark.

This is it.

I think i might pick up boxing after i move out of this apartment.

And that is whats gunna happen to you.

If you dont stay away.

And that song is bullshit.

cause i would rather die,

then fall for you

your just a pile of dog poop :)

Usless your Justin . ;D

Cause we are awsomness in your pants

times billion plus

the penguins.

Well buh bye.

you are the one,
the one going down
DOWN GOES ANOTHER ONE!~
AYE,



I cant help but feel like this..

Exactly how i feel.

I just want to run away.

I dont think there is anything else that needs to be said.

I just recently realized

how hard it is

how much it hurts

to bring myself down from the clouds.

Two feet on the ground

i still feel like i want to fly

I I no longer know

what to say

How could i make it okay

Step by Step i gotta walk

and no i cant look back

Let go off my hand

Let me slip away

Its my escape

Let me do the things i want

Let me save my own life

I want to be free

oh yeah .

The grass, the hell below my feet

the snow, it used to glitter in the dark.

I just recently realized

what i have been missing ,

flying so high, untouchable.

Let go of my hand

let me slip away

I, Its time for me

To do things my way

Let me go

I want to be free

two feet on the ground

i want to be free.

If i had never met you

Id still be in the clouds

But i dont hate you

It feels so good to be real

Im no longer a ghost

But i

i want to be free

thats why

your feelings never

i will never let them get in my way.

Let go of my hand

Let me slip away

i no longer need you by my side

Stop holding me down i wont fly away

Let go of my heart

Let me slip away

Im no longer the wind , no longer the rain

im the storm braking down

everything on my way .

Cause i im finally free

two feet on the ground...

Im walking.

God is not here but i will never leave,

I think that when we lose love we also lose a part of our confidence.

I havent lost my love cause the way i am now I havent been in love

not once in my whole lifetime.

When i look at what im writing on this blog now,

what i used to write in my notebooks last year the same time

and all the years before that

I guess i really have grown up a bit.

Back then there were times when i used to manipulate people,

i used to play around alot and i used to concentrate on revenge

and hatred no matter the person i was facing.

I dont think theres anyone who has met me,

who didnt smile cause of me but

there are also alot who smiled for me

and got thrown away and hurt

I know its not possible to live a life without hurting somone

on your way

but for this once

I feel like i should do the useless thing

get on my knees, throw away the pride

and say

" Im truly really sorry.I hope you can someday forgive me"

even with that done and said

we all know ,

only more people will get hurt in the future too.

I really have been searching for rainbows,

and i do go where the wind blows,

in the end i dont know,

what is love?