Sometimes, the spring is wonderful.
Overflowing rivers, 
as if washing away all the dirt
before the big bloom.

and yet sometimes , 
all it does is wash the dirt ashore

I wont whine this time.
I have made up my mind,
sure as hell 
i wish i didnt feel that way.
Its all i have got.

the next time i crumble apart i 
im not sure i can build myself up again.
so , I 
I suppose im just letting this pain go.
Stop thinking.
And be an empty shell for a while.
until my heart stops beathing in the right rythm 
and my mind is more thn just an empty page.

Right now im 
dissapointed
lost and hurt.

like always 
ha ha ha

this time , 
i wont let it drop me down below tho.

sure does mean lotsa changes .

I cant bury my rotten soul

not anymore,

it already smells so damn bad

that even you know and see.

All the wounds ,

Im just a simple corpse,

apart from the fact that

i still move and decide on my free will.

but you dont even admit

you dont even see

how damn much you hurt me.

I suppose its my own fault,

cause im never leaving

always here

and i always just bleh forgive.

so , im the

i take you for granted girl

as i have always been

and i cant blame anyone

its the path i chose

its not like i never had the chance to change things

or walk away.

So i wont whine.

Doesnt mean im pleased with it.